For Old Times' Sake
by Kassia
Summary: During a plane flight, Warren reflects on some recent- and tragic- events.


The X-Men belong to Marvel, but the story is mine so please ask before archiving. 

As always, this has no place in continuity, though you could probably find it a spot if you felt like it. By the way, Warren is the first character I've written based souly on reading a couple of comics. Wish me luck. 

Enjoy. 

**For Old Times' Sake**   
By Kassia 

I could never sleep on planes. Betsy was always able to fall asleep whenever and wherever she wanted. I swear sometimes she'd will herself to sleep just to spite me. When she woke up she'd be bright-eyed and energetic, ready for anything. I might as well be using my own two wings to travel for all the rest I get on a plane. 

It's not that there's any reason to fall asleep yet. It's just that I have so much to think about, and I'd really rather not think about any of it. I wish I could just sleep the whole flight away. The whole next few weeks away. Maybe the next year. 

I must've been crazy to do this. I wonder what Betsy would say. But Betsy's not here... that's the whole point, isn't it? 

I glance over at the woman next to me. Rogue is braiding her hair. She had it done up in a loose bun before, but her masses of wavy hair refused to stay in an orderly knot at the nape of her neck like Betsy's would have done. The white stripe in the braid makes for a nice effect, anyway. 

She seems to feel my gaze on her, and she flashes me a grin before turning her attention back to her hair. 

I must've been absolutely insane to have done this. But I don't think I could've refused her even if I had been sane. 

She's finished with her hair, and suddenly she turns, raising her head to speak to a person behind us. "Don't worry. Ah'll watch him for you." 

I hear the woman behind me thank her, and then she gets up and walks past me down the aisle. "What was that about?" I ask. She's been very aware of the people around us this whole trip, aware of their actions and moods, and sometimes it gets a bit strange. 

Rogue gets onto her knees on the seat and looks behind her. "She needed to use the restroom, and she wasn't sure whether to take her baby or not. So Ah offered to watch it." The baby gurgles, and Rogue gurgles back. She slips her glove off and extends a finger to the baby. I twist my head around, and I can see the baby clutch her naked finger with its tiny, fat hand. I'm not at all surprised. 

She woke me up with a kiss. I had returned the kiss instinctively, and it took me a second to remember that the lips pressed against mine couldn't possibly be Betsy's. I sat up with a jerk to find Rogue smiling at me, bewilderingly. And I wasn't in a coma. "You can control your powers now?" It was a stupid question, but I still wasn't quite awake. 

She nodded. "Betsy's touched me before, I just never understood how it worked until now." 

"So I guess some good came out of this, huh?" I asked her coldly. 

Her expression became wary, and she shook her head mutely. "Ah need to get out of here," she said, and then displayed a suitcase in case I had missed the point. 

I almost asked her why she was telling me this, but then felt an odd shiver run down my spine as the answer occured to me. It was kind of flattering, but also kind of frightening. I heard myself say, "Where do you want to go?" 

"Ah don't know. You choose." Her accent flickered out of existence for a moment, "I can't take these people any more, and you're the only one who it seemed I could rely on." 

Tell me, honestly, how could I possibly have refused? 

She seated herself cross-legged on the bed, suitcase in her lap. I stumbled to my closet and opened it, then paused and asked the woman on my bed if she'd mind turning around while I got dressed. 

She laughed. "But, Warren..." 

"I don't care. Just turn around." 

She had shrugged a closed her eyes, but a Mona Lisa smile was still playing on her lips. 

Her smile for the baby is a lot different. In fact, it's brilliant. If being short and fat and bald would get me the same smiles that babies get, I'd stop exercising, shave my head, and cut off my legs below the knees. 

The mother returns, thanks her baby-sitter, and Rogue sinks back into her seat. She looks at her lap and murmurs, "You know, Betsy wanted a baby." 

For a second I can only blink at her. Why did she have to tell me that? "No, I didn't know." 

Rogue nods, then stares out the window even though it's too dark to see anything. She looks so fragile, you'd never guess that it had taken a world class telepath and telekinetic, a woman who could control the weather, and a man with inhuman strength and agility to take her down before. And that's not even tallying in the casualties. 

I had arrived too late to see any of the action. More importantly, I had arrived too late to prevent any of the action. 

I've rarely seen Jean look so exhausted as she did that evening. She had looked at me as if she wasn't quite sure who I was or why I was there. But she had managed a weary, "Warren." 

"Jean. Are you okay? Where is she? I mean, are they?" 

"The infirmary," said Jean, knowing my first question was merely a pleasantry. "Hank is there." 

I've run to the infirmary a few times in my day, but never so quickly as I did that time. Not that it mattered. I could've teleported, and it wouldn't have made a difference. 

Hank greeted me reservedly and ushered me in. I saw Bobby first. He wasn't hit too hard, said Hank. Good. One less worry. Gambit was in the next bed. Forgive me for not caring. Then Rogue. Jean took her out. She'll live. 

Then Betsy. 

She was at the other end of the infirmary. For a moment, I had frozen, not sure I wanted to make the last leg of the journey. I had this feeling that if I saw her up close, all my worst fears, then merely speculation, would become certainties. 

But Hank was watching me, so I went over stood beside her and wished I wasn't anywhere in her vicinity. I turned away, ostensibly to ask Hank a question, but it had really been because I couldn't bear to look at her face. She was breathing, but that didn't mean anything; her face was lifeless. 

"Do you think she'll come out of it?" I whispered. I don't know why I whispered. It's not like any of them could hear me. 

Hank had shrugged. "She was the first victim, and whatever was controlling Rogue was making a point of acquiring Betsy's telepathic abilities. She... held on for a long time. But, though it may take longer, I do believe she'll eventually recover consciousness." 

That was almost a month ago. 

I don't know who Hank thinks he's fooling. I've known him for years, become familiar with every nuance of his expressive countenance, every twist and turn of language he uses to try to manipulate the conversation. He was using all his doctor's evasions long before he became a doctor. Even now, calling up an image of his face as he told me that, I know he was lying. 

See? This is why I wish I could fall asleep. 

Rogue seems to have cheered up a little. That could be the work of the cocktails. She clenches her fist and makes a psychic knife, then plunges it into her brain. She stabs herself in the head a few times, and grins at me. "Pretty cool, huh?" 

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that Bobby isn't quite conscious yet. 

Food is brought to us by a stewardess, and Rogue brightens up even more. She falls ravenously on the strange rectangular thing that's supposed to be lasagna. Betsy's secret shame was her love of airplane food. When she revealed that to me, that's when I began to suspect she was letting me in more than she wanted me to know. 

I wonder if Rogue always liked airplane food, or if this is a new development. 

I wonder what she'll be like when all the personalities have settled. 

The X-Men probably think that I've flipped, that I've stolen Rogue in some twisted attempt to get Betsy back. It's nothing like that, though. I know she isn't Betsy, and I know she never will be. I'm not trying to use her as a replacement. That would be worse than falling in love with a woman and settling for her twin. Hell, that would be worse than falling in love with a woman and setting for her clone. 

Rogue laughs. After a confused pause I realize what she's laughing at. I look at her accusingly. "No mind reading." 

"Sorry," she says, abashed. "It's hard not to. Ah still can't quite figure out these powers." 

"You seem to be using them well enough," I say drily. 

She grins impishly. "Yeah." She becomes more serious, and touches my arm lightly. "Thank you for doing this, Warren. It means a lot to me." 

I shrug. "It's no problem." 

A smile dawns again, heartbreakingly familiar but wrong on those lips. "Really?" she says interestedly. 

"Really." She's all I have left of Betsy, after all. And it was the Betsy in her that asked for my help. I know she's not a replacement for Psylocke, but she can at least be a memorial. 

I can't pretend Betsy was the love of my life. I know that sounds horrible, but I can't lie about it, not with her unconscious body lying in the infirmary at the mansion. I didn't look at her and think 'til death do us part. She knew that. We understood each other. 

But every now and then, I'd catch her at the right moment, in the right light, and I'd think that this had to be forever. That I couldn't stand it if it wasn't. 

Right now, all I can think about are those moments. 

I pride myself on having seen Betsy like none of the others have. Silly Betsy, impetuous Betsy, Betsy overcome with annoyance at some tiny, unimportant thing. Everyone saw Betsy sailing through life like she was queen of all she surveyed. Fewer people saw behind the scenes. 

I remember one time we were on our way to a party, and her dress had somehow gotten ripped right below her hip. She had stared at the rip a moment, seeming not to hear my suggestion we go back to the apartment and get her another dress. Then she had ripped the skirt in three places and turned to me, asking me to help her rip up the bodice a little for balance. 

She had carried it off, of course. I may have been a little put off by the fact that my date's formerly demure dress now exposed more skin than her X-Men uniform, but I had never doubted she could carry it off. 

Rogue makes a sort of pained noise, and I lean towards her, concerned. "You feel okay? Are the people's thoughts bothering you?" That was what was usually wrong when Betsy was uncomfortable. 

She shakes her head, pressing her lips together. "No, it's just... I remember that." 

I can't very well tell her to stop reading my mind when there are tears starting in her eyes. "Good," I say, before I can stop myself. "I'm glad I'm not the only one." 

"It's not as if Ah didn't have enough of an identity crisis, what with Kwannon, and now this." She doesn't seem to notice her mistake, and I'm certainly not going to point it out. She looks at me earnestly. "Ah should've fought it, not let it take over my mind. I should have resisted." 

Now I'm on familiar ground. Mental resistance to evil influences trying to control one's mind. She's preaching to the choir. "I'm betting there's nothing you could've done, Rogue." 

"Ah don't know, Ah really don't. Ah'm sorry Ah've made a mess of this all, Warren. Ah really am. It must be so confusing, not knowing whether you're supposed to be mourning Betsy, or hoping she'll recover, or what." 

I shake my head, and say softly, "No, there's no confusion. I'm mourning her, definitely. I'm just helping you out because, because..." I search her face. Why am I helping her out, exactly? She's not Betsy. She should be at the mansion, where she can be taken care of, get her chaotic mind organized. 

"You're helping me as a memorial. Ah know," says Rogue. She sounds dubious, but I'm not really listening. All I can think is, what a stupid memorial. A decent boyfriend would be off getting revenge on whoever or whatever it was that had taken control of Rogue, not leaving that to Scott and Jean and running off with some other woman. 

Rogue sighs. "Here we are, the two chief mourners, you for the love, me for the guilt." 

"Yeah," I begin to agree, but stop. No. "Damn!" I hit my forehead, since it seems the only suitable gesture. "Did anyone tell Brian?" 

Rogue looks suddenly worried, and says quickly. "It's okay, really. It's better if he doesn't know until we're absolutely certain Betsy won't make it. He'd hate this situation." She shrinks a little, under my wide-eyed, bemused gaze. "Ah mean, Betsy would rather he didn't know yet, Ah'm sure." 

"I'm sure," I agree, still staring at her. I can't help it. This has to be the weirdest situation I've ever been in. The most stupid, tragic, bizarre situation I've been in. 

Of course, it's not as weird as when she still had Gambit's powers. She used the charm indiscriminately, and men and women alike would stare after her as she passed, wondering why they found this skunk-striped woman so attractive. 

I'm kind of looking forward to when Rogue next encounters Gambit. First of all, I'm betting that absorbing his personality and memories only makes you more contemptuous of him and his thought processes. Secondly, Psylocke never took any crap from the Cajun, and maybe now Rogue won't either. A few good ninja moves with super strength behind them could work wonders in the way of discouraging Gambit. 

Beside me, Rogue reclines her seat and closes her eyes. 

I sigh, preparing to have everyone around me asleep, leaving me to my happy, happy thoughts. God. I wish I had packed sleeping pills, but I had been in something of a hurry. 

We had flown to JFK. As in, flown using our powers. I had kept glancing behind us, expecting to see the Blackbird chasing after us. Rogue had displayed a Psylocke-ish nonchalance the whole way, to my chagrin. I'd really have preferred to have a panicky female to soothe, to take my mind off my own worries. 

Rogue had carried all the bags, too. It occurred to me, now that she has a telepathic powers, she's basically invincible. I mentioned that to her, to have something to say to pass the time, but she snorted derisively. 

"Yeah, just what I need. More invulnerability." She was shouting, since her voice was muffled by her scarf. Unlike me, she had wisely bundled up. Then she looked back at me and says, "Don't you get tired, flying that way?" 

"Not really. A little, but this is nothing my wings can't handle." 

"Huh. Well, if you get too tired, Ah can carry you." She smiled mischievously, knowing perfectly well that I'd fall out of the sky before I'd let her carry me. 

Rogue's asleep now. Looking at her, I've got a feeling I'd do all of this again in a heartbeat. I mean, not just for the sake of the Betsy in her, but for Rogue's sake. True, the occasional murmur of 'Bloody hell' on her part contributed to my desire to help her, but she's been tormented so much by this whole situation, by life and love and luck, I'm glad to help her take a break from it all for a while. 

And I need a break. I can't stand being in the same house as Betsy's body. I couldn't stand watching Rogue slowly lose Bobby's and Remy's powers and personalities while Betsy remained in full force inside of her. 

Of course, I guess I'll still have to watch that happen. Maybe this has nothing to do with sadness, or compassion, or escape. Maybe this whole trip is just self-punishment. 

They're bringing around breakfast. Reluctantly, I nudge Rogue. "Hey, time to wake up. Food, and then we'll be there soon. I think you'll like Italy." 

She opens her eyes and looks sleepily at me. "Of course. I liked it before, after all." She smiles, a smile of memories. A smile like she knows me, like she loves me, like it makes perfect sense that she's next to me on a flight to Rome. Then she closes her eyes again, and I can only gape, completely shaken by that look and by the revelations it holds. 

She's not Betsy. Not at all. 

I know that. 

Honestly... 

Maybe. 

Sort of. 

Oh, God. 

Suddenly, I really need a drink. I glance around, hoping a stewardess is nearby who can bring me some of those miniature bottles of alcohol, but there are no flight attendants in sight. I may be a very demanding person, but even I'm reticent about pressing that red button next to the lights and airconditioning. 

I can't believe myself sometimes. A memorial to the dead. Helping Rogue out. Yeah, right. 

Know thyself. 

I'm an idiot. I know that much. 

Whatever the X-Men are thinking about this escapade, they're probably right. 

I glance over at Rogue, who's fallen asleep again, just like that. 

I must've been crazy. 

But what frightens me is that I wouldn't undo it if I could. 


End file.
